Have $500 to burn and are trying to get laid? Jardiniere in SF is your place.

by sanjosebarstool

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So I made no secret that I went saw Burt Bacharach with the San Francisco Symphony last night. Went with my parents and am not gonna lie, kinda was hoping for a slim chance they got killed in a robbery gone wrong upon leaving just so I could technically become Batman.

That being said, checked out Jardiniere three blocks from City Hall. I’m almost positive the French translation means “panty dropper.” Place look liked it was out of a Baz Lurhman movie set and I was a little disappointed I didn’t have Ewon MacGregor as my singing waiter. Anyways, place was dimly lit, had maybe the coolest bar I have ever seen. Was downing $11 Strubbe’s Belgian Red’s like it was my job. Dinner? No big deal, just spare ribs from some meat only available in Asia (not dog). Desert? 5 different cheeses from across the country; shit was delectable. Did I mention all the waiters look like members of Weezer that have to be nice to you? Suburban kid in heaven.

Anyways, not only could this be the new premier place to try and get laid on a date, it’s probably the premier cougar bar from what I could divulge. Kind of a bad look but kind of a good look when some older broads is buying you a drink at the bar in front of your parents several tables away.

As far as I can tell this is the perfect location to divulge anything. Surprise divorce? Jardiniere. Telling your girlfriend you want to try the backdoor? Jardiniere. If my parents were to tell me I was adopted, this would be the place to have that news broke to me.

Jardiniere, the perfect place to ask you wanna try anal.

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